We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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