you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
