i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
