I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Farmville is her only friend.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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