let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize