I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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