Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
And then my night got REAL pukey
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
