I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
