i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
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