just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
All the doctor said was why
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
