i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Randomize
