She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I think i got beer on your cat.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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