Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
