Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
