I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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