If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Never let your siblings swipe right.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
