my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
