Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
