Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
