ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
40s are totally the cure
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
