She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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