His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
