your thong is hanging out like whoa
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
