kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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