We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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