that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
