I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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