so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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