Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
