But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
