this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
