I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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