I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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