What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
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