Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Randomize