You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
