hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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