this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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