summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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