singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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