As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
