with your own penis?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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