Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize
