i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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