I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize
