I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Dear god my vagina.
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