How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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