I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
