How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I intend to get homeless drunk
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
