just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
