i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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